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return_to_nolaSeth didn't have a resolution for his grief, or the extremely specific and unpleasant feeling of being married and also extremely not married. He didn't have a resolution for the discovery and loss of a beloved sister, let alone an entire life.
But what he did have was a resolution for what had between himself and Caleb. What he had was confirmation that their bond was genuine and borne of this life, right here and right now, in this year, in this town.
And Seth knew, like Jean-Paul knew, that life was aggressively short and unconscionably difficult. Seth, like Jean-Paul, knew that circumstance wasn't an excuse; that good things had to be fought for or else they would be lost.
So Seth was grieving, and confused, and overwhelmed with memories. But he also wanted to kiss the hell out of Caleb. So that's what he did: he went to Caleb's, and he texted when he was outside so he wouldn't wake up Caleb's daughter, and when the door opened, he kissed Caleb like a greeting and an apology and reassurance that, despite the trauma and confusion, this man still wanted the man that was Caleb.
But what he did have was a resolution for what had between himself and Caleb. What he had was confirmation that their bond was genuine and borne of this life, right here and right now, in this year, in this town.
And Seth knew, like Jean-Paul knew, that life was aggressively short and unconscionably difficult. Seth, like Jean-Paul, knew that circumstance wasn't an excuse; that good things had to be fought for or else they would be lost.
So Seth was grieving, and confused, and overwhelmed with memories. But he also wanted to kiss the hell out of Caleb. So that's what he did: he went to Caleb's, and he texted when he was outside so he wouldn't wake up Caleb's daughter, and when the door opened, he kissed Caleb like a greeting and an apology and reassurance that, despite the trauma and confusion, this man still wanted the man that was Caleb.
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Date: 2019-05-15 12:14 am (UTC)"If I'm here, Kyle is absolutely drinking cocktails on a beach, flirting with handsome men. And good for him." Seth smiled a little. He had to believe that Kyle, wherever he was, was making the most of life. It was an essential part of what made Kyle so fucking lovable.
"Scott has a boyfriend?" Seth tipped his head, considering. "Yes, I can see it. All that Summers repression."
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Date: 2019-05-15 12:20 am (UTC)Caleb did laugh then. "The X-Men are very gay this lifetime, actually. His boyfriend is Quicksilver." Look, if Caleb had to have that knowledge, Seth did too. It was only fair.
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Date: 2019-05-15 12:22 am (UTC)"Oh, the inferior speedster twin," Seth said immediately, almost offended."You win this round, Caleb."
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Date: 2019-05-15 12:38 am (UTC)That surprised him into a laugh loud enough that he had to clap his hand over his mouth so he wouldn't wake Scottie. When he finally managed to control himself and drop his hand, he was still grinning. "I definitely win."
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Date: 2019-05-15 12:44 am (UTC)Seth grinned, because he was very pleased, thank you very much. "Shh," he teased. "You'll wake the sleeping child."
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Date: 2019-05-15 12:59 am (UTC)"The child luckily sleeps pretty deeply, I am just paranoid and also really don't want her seeing you here before I tell her I'm seeing someone and also you get to meet her in a non-horribly awkward context." Not like Caleb wasn't going to feel at least a little awkward when they met, but a faint current of awkwardness ran through most of parenting anyway. "But you should definitely kiss me some more and remind me how much I'm winning."
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Date: 2019-05-15 01:02 am (UTC)"Let me tell you the truth, Caleb," Seth murmured, leaning in to kiss him, "I won."
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Date: 2019-05-15 01:10 am (UTC)When Seth said things like that, Caleb wondered how he ever thought he could avoid developing feelings for this man. He kissed Seth with joy and gratitude and, yes, love, committed to staying in that moment for as long as he could.
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Date: 2019-05-15 01:23 am (UTC)It was better here, on shared ground. It was better that they both knew, even if Seth still hated the knowing. It was better because they weren't pretending their feelings weren't real, or they they weren't important. Seth kissed Caleb luxuriously, taking the privileges the moment afforded him.
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Date: 2019-05-15 02:49 am (UTC)"When do you have to be at work tomorrow?" Caleb murmured. "I'm trying to figure out how long I can keep you here without you missing out on too much beauty sleep."
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Date: 2019-05-15 02:51 am (UTC)"I have a six forty-five a.m call time," Seth answered with a grimace. "Which is late after the last few weeks."
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Date: 2019-05-15 02:56 am (UTC)Real life really did insist on being intrusive and rude, didn't it? "So I should let you go home and get some sleep."
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Date: 2019-05-15 03:03 am (UTC)"Not yet." Soon, maybe, but not yet. Not when Seth could kiss Caleb again, curving in close.
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Date: 2019-05-15 03:57 am (UTC)Caleb wrapped his arms around Seth. What a privilege to be able to do that, and not one Caleb intended to take for granted.
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Date: 2019-05-15 04:00 am (UTC)“Those strong arms,” Seth said softly, approvingly. “I keep thinking about them.”
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Date: 2019-05-15 04:28 am (UTC)"Good. I like knowing you're thinking about me."
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Date: 2019-05-15 04:34 am (UTC)"You've given so much to think about," Seth said wryly, but that didn't stop him from running an appreciative hand over Caleb's forearm.